It's been a long time coming: the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoons are finally on DVD (detailed review on official TMNT web site)! Something tells me they're just testing the market, because this release only includes the first five episodes, plus four bonus episodes from the tenth and final season. With a suggested retail price of $14.98, you can purchase from Amazon ($12.73), Best Buy ($12.99), DVD Empire ($10.49), Overstock.com ($9.99 + $1.40 shipping), or any vendor listed at Epinions. If you're a Turtles fan, then tell all your friends to buy it so we can see more classic TMNT on DVD!

In related news, you can catch the new (2003) TMNT cartoons on Cartoon Network at 6pm (ET) weeknights.

For the second week in a row, we were second-best to "Short Bus" -- and even though we beat everyone else in the place, they beat us by almost sixty points. We got spanked. We got spanked hard. But it's okay, because I knew all the "random shit" questions. I think I was given the new nickname "random shit boy". I was wearing a bright green Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles shirt, to which someone replied that a DVD featuring the first five of the original cartoons was released, and I immediately decided that I will not be satisfied until I own it. So we won second place and I'm pissed because I don't have that DVD. Grrrr.

Last Thursday, I scored a 92 on my Professional Communications final exam, leaving me with an A for the course. I don't think I could have made a B in that class if I had tried to fail the final. In fact, I didn't look at my text or my notes, and I didn't consult with anyone in the class at all, within one week of the final. I knew it would be that easy for me. And I was actually upset that I missed four questions! Okay, so the true-false questions were tricky, but I just misinterpreted one of the multiple choice questions... Ugh.

Well, this is the earliest I have left for school all semester. I'll arrive before 7:00am, which is even earlier than I arrived at school for SGA Day!, and I shall use the time before my 8:00am final to refresh my memory of world history before 1550 (or was that 1615?) in order to score higher than a 90 on this final exam... which is actually a lot harder than it sounds, since I only scored a 76 or so on the midterm.

Then I must draft the midterm evaluation for my internship that I have already done once, on the old SGA computer that was taken and wiped clean when the new one arrived, but they say they don't have it despite that I turned it in with a stack of work logs several weeks ago... or so I thought. Maybe I didn't. But then I have to do the final evaluation and turn in my boss's evaluation... If they deduct points for turning that in late, I will be disappointed, but as long as they don't do anything irrational like fail me for my internship credit when I have obviously done more than necessary to fulfill that requirement, then there will be no hard feelings.

Au revoir!

I just spent eight hours at Barnes & Noble typing my last research paper for my world history class. I have already written two similar papers on the same topic: the first was a brief analysis of textbooks surveys of the origins of Confucianism and Taoism, and the second was a brief analysis of historians' and translators' interpretations of the same topic, which focused mostly on the lives of Confucius and Lao-tzu. The third paper is a primary source paper, meaning I relied entirely on translations of the two primary works on which Confucianism and Taoism are based: the Analects of Confucius and the Tao-te-Ching.

You know what sucks? I analyzed only two small passages from each work, and it took eight pages. Imagine if I actually wanted to analyze the full work! Hmm... that's an idea, actually. I could do it fairly easily, and with access to better (and more) resources, I could churn out a dissertation on each work, although it would probably take weeks. But I didn't mind sitting in the bookstore for several hours today, so I imagine I could handle it if I made that choice.

Anyway, after turning this paper in at 8:00am, I take Dr. Taylor's final exam (100 tough multiple choice questions plus a "prove it" option on up to 10 of them for a chance at 10 bonus points), and then I finish my final evaluation for my internship and turn that in. Hopefully, I get all of this done tomorrow and I can close the book on this semester. I'm tired!

This weekend saw the Macon State College Quiz Bowl team attend yet another (two) tournament(s) at the University of Tennessee at Chattanooga. The tournament of the academic variety was the MoonPie Classic, brought to you by MoonPie, the original marshmallow sandwich. Yes, they threw MoonPies at us. And we caught them. And we ate them. And it was good.

The academic tournaments' chief purpose is to serve as valid reasoning for receiving school funding for attending trash tournaments, the variety that covers sports, games, television, movies, music, random shit, and personal anecdotes. This weekend's trash tournament was the RC Cola Classic, brought to you by RC Cola. Don't ask me why, but the Free Dictionary Encyclopedia says "RC Cola is an especially popular soft drink in the American South, where it is commonly served in conjunction with moon pies." As I implied above, you should know a shitload of random shit to compete in this tournament.

The trash tournaments are more fun because the team and players choose pseudonyms, the interpretation of which are often largely dependent on the degree of perversion of the listener's mind. Our names this weekend:

We did not have a winning record, as well we shouldn't when competing against teams from UGA, Tennessee, Kentucky, and other schools a few multiples the size of Macon State. What is more important is that we had lots of fun, and that I placed fourth out of everyone at the competition in the qualifying music round, and I placed third in the music round final. (FYI, in the qualifying round, the first few [instrumental] seconds of a song are played, and you must write down the title and artist -- 2 for one or the other, 5 for both. In the final round, the top ten qualifiers compete against each other using a buzzer system to buzz in and name songs as soon as they are recognized.)

So all was good and I got home last night around 10:30, only to have to unpack, get some stuff to go to Keesha's, and finally crash at 12:30... only to awaken at 7:00 for a long day of school stuff and research-paper typing. Fun-ness.

We won second place at trivia night tonight. It was Keesha's first time, and for the first time Adam and I joined Kim's team because almost no one from either team showed up... and the six of us won second place. Therefore, we rock, they suck, and we got all the money to get free food next time! The end.

I've developed a sudden desire to JavaScript-ify a web site. Probably not this one, but I want to develop some spiffy code and put some of my cool scripts to good use. So far I've developed tons of neat little scripts for various purposes, and otherwise they've not been put to any personal use. Well, I would hate for perfectly spiffy code to go to waste by being used professionally, once, and never again. So I aim to either spice up this web site a bit -- which is less likely -- or develop a new web site, such as for one of the many clubs with which I am involved at school. Naturally, I'll let you know what I decide when I actually put forth some effort and have something to show you. Don't expect anything until then!

Yes, that's right. In other words, this is a post about nothing.

UPDATE 2004.04.21 @ 09:26 -- Well, not entirely nothing. I've decided to show you samples of the scripts I plan to utilize to make this web site a bit more dynamic. For vague reasons that I no longer recall, I have stuffed a few small things in random.php and new.htm. Actually, you may recognize new.htm as something I worked on over two years ago and have not touched since. Well, I've used the code, just not on this web site. Hopefully, I'll put it to better use in the coming weeks.

The code in random.php is more direct; that is, rather than seeing the effects the scripting applied to an HTML frame, I have simply provided examples of what the code does. Included are an IP retriever (could be useful for generating content based on your location), a strong browser detector (extremely useful for cross-browser code generation), and a content-randomizer (very cool for things that don't need to be arranged in any particular order). Go ahead. Reload random.php over and over. The numbers 1-5 will be randomized each time but never duplicated, and your IP address and browser will be displayed in the same place (although I could randomize their location as well).

Naturally, should you find any mistakes or should either page do something stupid like crash your web browser, you should let me know so I can fix that.

I saw Kill Bill for the first time when my school showed Volume 1 at 7:00 Wednesday night. I then saw Volume 2 at 4:00 Friday afternoon with a group of friends. What I expected going in was a bloodbath, a blade-fest with decapitations-and-dismemberment galore -- what else could be expected from a movie by Quentin Tarantino with a sexy woman holding a sword on the DVD's box cover? Well, I'll tell you (the text in the box contains minor spoilers):

The first movie was exactly what I expected: a comic-book-style, bloody bladefest with arms and heads flying and a great story to back it up. To avoid spoiling the plot, I'll say no more about Volume 1. Volume 2 was radically different -- which is actually a good thing. At first, I wanted the resolution of the first film's action to include Uma Thurman dismembering and decapitating her way to the film's climax. I came out of the theatre oddly disappointed that there wasn't enough violence, but loving the movie all the same -- the story and characters were developed a good bit more, and it was just a better film.

I won't spoil any more; and I haven't spoiled much to begin with. The music in both movies is incredible, and the cinematography and swordsmanship is excellent. There are few things more exciting than a sexy woman like Uma Thurman handling a Hattori Hanzo sword like a samurai master. Word to Pai Mei.

If you're curious about future DVD plans, such as the potential for a special edition and/or bonus material, you'll want to read what's on the other side of this link. Key information: (a) a special Japanese edition of Volume 1 will be spliced with Volume 2 for a single, developer's edition theatrical release in America and Europe later this year; (b) there will be lots of DVD extras, so you might not want to buy that regular Volume 1 DVD yet.

Tomorrow, the Student Government Association is sponsoring Students Get Active Day on the Warner Robins Campus of Macon State College. Clever, isn't it? Exciting, isn't it? Exhausting isn't it? Yes, Mr. President, very clever. Definitely exciting. Exhausting? Whatchoo talkin' bout, Willis?

I think I have everything taken care of, but chaos always dictates the unnatural path that any event I plan shall take. The odds aren't on my side from the start, because even the Student Life Office was very disorganized this morning when it came to figuring out who was doing what for whom and what reason and when and how and... Do you see what I mean? If the staff are disorganized, I should be further distressed tomorrow to find that they want answers from me that I don't have!

At this point, I find it crucial to make shit up. Just tell them how I want it even if I have no idea, just so they have some (random?) direction in which to move. This way, stuff gets done and it looks like I was incredibly prepared, and we all have a happy day... even if we have ice-cold smoothies in 60° weather. Eh, whatever. I like smoothies.

Now if only those apathetic college students for whom this entire charade is being prepared would actually stand up straight, close their mouths, open their ears, and do something with the information I give them... Now that would make everyone's day! But we're realists over here, and we hold no expectations. Except no rain. God, it will not rain. I mean, please, God. We don't want it to rain tomorrow, because to my knowledge there is no backup plan for that.

Hmm. And the world shall rest easy tonight knowing that I am having pizza for dinner. Splack.

After a year of harder-than-necessary work as Student Government President, not really knowing what to do but doing it anyway, I've decided I want to do it again as Vice President. Essentially, what the demotion means now that I know what to do and how to do it is that I'll be taking on exactly the same workload, while Andrew takes on the responsibilities and privileges of President and whips the Macon State College SGA into shape. Oh yes -- 2004-2005 will be a good year for the Student Government, and the administration will be sufficiently annoyed! Hopefully, this does not have any negative impact on my awards, recommendations, and so on from Macon State College next year and in the future.

Don't bother trying to figure out, from me or from anyone else, what my after-college plans are. I have no idea at the moment, therefore no one else should have any clue whatsoever -- except maybe Keesha, but only because she is the only other person with whom I am really concerned in that regard at this time.

Would you look at that? I used "whom" properly. Good night.

Those words will echo in my head for the next few months, I'm sure, as they were the last words spoken by Bob before I rear-ended the car in front of me on I-75. Don't worry, there were no tires flying, glass shattering, or airbags deflating (thankfully), but in a traffic jam that had already delayed us for nearly an hour, I was in no mood to sit around for another 45 minutes haggling with myself over the financian disadvantages of being the behind car in a rear-end collision. Everyone's okay, including Bob, who handled a lot of the phone stuff while I checked the driver of the Hyundai Elantra in front of me. But the car's hood and grill are accordingly shifted a good six inches, which has crinkled the hood to a sporty new angle that, if not for the fact that it no longer fits well with the bumper, would look pretty cool.

There is no difference in the car's performance; the impact wasn't serious enough for that. This is a good thing, because Bob and I were halfway to Atlanta after receiving free tickets to the Atlanta Braves game from Max and his dad, who had just left about the time of impact (we ended up beating them there by about 30 minutes, and they took the scenic route on Georgia Highway 23/87).

If you didn't watch last night's game between the Braves and Cubs, you missed a good one. Inexplicably, the Braves offense was held to one run in 15 innings after scoring 28 in the previous 18 innings. But I didn't care, because it was a damn good game! As the 15th and the game appeared to be coming to an end shortly after midnight, the four of us joked about getting our money's worth -- free tickets, three rows from the field, and six extra innings! While that sounds good on the surface, it emphasized a really stupid Atlanta Braves business policy: to close all eateries by about the 8th inning. The idiocy of this policy became progressively obvious as the game lingered on past 11:00, as those of us who hadn't eaten in several hours were sorely aware that we could purchase no food in the park.

Last night's game lasted 4:32, which is actually not the longest game I've been to. On June 14, 1997, I was part of the second game of the first interleague series ever (between the Braves and Baltimore Orioles), and that Saturday game lasted 4:54 (12 innings) -- the longest nine-inning game in National League history before going into extra innings. That Orioles game was nifty because it had rained all week, then it stopped about ten minutes before game time, then it started again about ten minutes before the game ended in the 12th. God wanted the Orioles and Braves to play that day!

Pictures of the car are forthcoming. It will live, and so will I.

Jeff Foxxworthy once said, "You might be a redneck if... Your mother has ever come out of the bathroom and said, "Ya'll come look at this before I flush it!" Close, but no cigar. Just a few moments ago, Mom came rushing out of the bathroom urging me to come look at what's in her toilet. Naturally, I was hesitant, and even more hesitant than I normally would have been since I was well into a long Flash movie that I didn't want to restart. But I stopped the movie and went to see what the fuss was about, and what do I see but a slimy little frog hopping his way around the bowl! I couldn't tell if he was one of those poisonous tree frogs, since I'm not really up on herpetology, I didn't take any chances. After trying to flush it once (because Mom wouldn't get too close) with the lid down so it wouldn't jump out and bounce around dripping Mom's toilet water everywhere, I tried a second time. But this time it was newly frightened by all the previously swirling water, so it tried to jump for it. It didn't make it, and on its way down it landed in my trap -- a wad of fresh toilet paper! I quickly dropped some more on it and flushed again, and upon lifting the lid I discovered a bowl of clear water as it should be.

And Mom used my toilet instead. The end.

This week's Reason Express offers the following titillation: "A new study of music file-sharing finds that downloading music has virtually no impact on music sales, effecting at worst perhaps a few million units out of some 800 million sold each year. The recording industry responds with sputtering." Monday's New York Times confirms this "conclusion reached by two economists [Felix Oberholzer-Gee of the Harvard Business School and Koleman S. Strumpf of the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill] who released a draft last week of the first study that makes a rigorous economic comparison of directly observed activity on file-sharing networks and music buying".

So there you have it. "Downloads have an effect on sales which is statistically indistinguishable from zero." Eat me, RIAA.

As if Guadalupe Lopez wasn't taken care of well enough by the success of her pop-star daughter, she goes off and wins $2.4 million in Las Vegas. Figures. All the world needed was one more thing Jen can blame on Ben.

I have an associate's degree in political science. I am about to get a bachelor's degree in information technology. And here I am writing a bigass research paper on the historical discrepancies regarding the origins of Taoism and Confucianism. What does ancient Chinese thought have to do with my program(s) of study?!

As I see it, Liberals advocate quick, progressive change for the better, and tend to include the "activists", because they're actively pushing for change. Conservatives advocate slow, cautious change for the better while emphasizing the maintenance of order and structure. Conservatives tend to include financiers and cultural traditionalists. Moderates are a mix, naturally. They have a tendency for civil rights activitism (more liberal) with a healthy respect for traditional family values advocacy (more conservative), and the fiscal politics can go either way.

Does this seem fair?

MLB 2004 has begun, and with that, my predictions are overdue. Every spring I like to predict the order of each division's final standings, the major award winners, and records that may or may not be broken. This year, I'm adding something new: a position-by-position dream team of current players, based on recent and/or expected performance. I'll keep this short and sweet, if possible.

NL East
Atlanta Braves
Philadelphia Phillies *
Florida Marlins
New York Mets
Montreal Expos

NL Central
Chicago Cubs
Houston Astros
St. Louis Cardinals
Cincinnati Reds
Milwaukee Brewers
Pittsburgh Pirates

NL West
Los Angeles Dodgers
San Diego Padres
Arizona Diamondbacks
San Francisco Giants
Colorado Rockies

AL East
Boston Red Sox
New York Yankees *
Baltimore Orioles
Toronto Blue Jays
Tampa Bay Devil Rays

AL Central
Minnesota Twins
Kansas City Royals
Chicago White Sox
Detroit Tigers
Cleveland Indians

AL West
Anaheim Angels
Seattle Mariners
Oakland Athletics
Texas Rangers

The Angels are going to be very, very good this year. The Braves are going to be surprisingly good in a very close race in the NL East. The Yankees are going to be very, very expensive, and no one will be able to afford the talent necessary to beat them over 162 games; however, the Red Sox will do so anyway, just because. The Reds, Royals, and Padres will be surprisingly good, but the Cubs will prove that this is their year. And I feel bad for the Indians, but for once, the Tigers have to do better than somebody.

The Playoffs

I don't know how the Division Series will be aligned, since those rules change each year, but I'll go ahead and pick your league champions: Red Sox and Cubs. Have fun picking a winner. I'm going to predict a marathon game seven that's delayed into November, a hurricane (in Chicago), then an earthquake at the make-up game (in Boston), and then it will rain sulfur before the World Series is called off to prove, once and for all, that both teams are cursed.

Award Winners
Hank Aaron / Hitter of the Year: Albert Pujols (Cardinals) and Manny Ramirez (Red Sox)
Cy Young / Pitcher of the Year: Kerry Wood (Cubs) and Jeff Weaver (Yankees)
Rookies of the Year: Adam LaRoche (Braves) and Joe Mauer (Twins)
Comeback Player of the Year: J.D. Drew (Braves) and Jermain Dye (Athletics)
Ancient Wonders of the World: Julio Franco (Braves) and Edgar Martinez (Mariners)

2004 Dream Team
RHP: Kerry Wood (Cubs)
LHP: Mark Mulder (Athletics)
Setup: Octavio Dotel (Astros)
Closer: Erig Gagne (Dodgers)
 C Javy Lopez (Orioles)
1B Todd Helton (Rockies)
2B Alfonso Soriano (Rangers)
3B Alex Rodriguez (Yankees)
SS Rafael Furcal (Braves)
LF Barry Bonds (Giants)
CF Carlos Beltran (Royals)
RF Vladimir Guerrero (Angels)

I did not intentionally make sure no two players play on the same team; that's just an interesting happenstance. Also, while no Braves appear on my primary dream team, at least three would be on my secondary team: John Smoltz (closer), Marcus Giles (2B), and Andruw Jones (CF). Also on such a secondary team would be a few Yankees: Jorge Posada ©, Jason Giambi (1B), Derek Jeter (SS), and Gary Sheffield (RF). Albert Pujols (LF) and Eric Chavez (3B) would round out the offense, and Pedro Martinez would be the righty on the mound. I don't know who I'd take as a second lefty or second setup man.

Well, this was just a frivolous glimpse at where I expect you can find success in 2004. Note that I ignored players I already know to be injured and missing significant amounts of playing time (such as Mark Prior and Nomar Garciaparra). Hopefully, they'll be back to prove me wrong!

Come back in October and see how wrong I was! Fair warning: I was incredibly accurate last year, predicting all six division winners correctly. This year, I'm hoping for more of the same!

I wrote articles on the Atlanta Braves' finalized opening day roster and the Georgia race for US Senate today, each full of useful links and information. People like Tommy and Tony should be pleased. As a dedicated reader, loyal friend, family member, casual acquaintance, random stranger, and/or arch nemisis, you should feel duty bound to click each of the two preceding links and read about the Atlanta Braves and the race for Georgia's US Senate seat.

Switching the times like this is just absurd. If it's an hour ahead now or an hour behind for the other five months, then why don't they just set a compromise and adjust the clocks by about half an hour? Instead of fast-forwarding one hour and pulling it back again in late October, we could just hit that half-hour between the two and never adjust our clocks! This would be so much easier, because we wouldn't have a nation full of bumbling, fumbling, stumbling idiots slamming their snooze buttons looking for another hour of sleep.

If they want Daylight Savings Time to be useful, then they should set the spring-forward moment for a Friday afternoon around 3:00 when everyone's at work, so we all get credit for our eight hours but we all feel overcome with joy at the thought of an early weekend. It's like a tax holiday, except much cheaper and the resulting celebration would pay for itself! Employees would fill bars and restaurants around the country thanking the government for a 23-hour day rather than complaining about an hour of lost sleep.

Perception is everything. You can still take our time away if you give us what we want. Don't jip us by stealing our sleep; sacrifice one hour of the workday, on a Friday afternoon when we don't work anyway because we're looking forward to the weekend, and the world will be a noticeably better place for at least a few hours each year.

Major League Baseball's All-Access Pass is $19.95 per month or $99.95 for the full season (video only is $14.95/month or $79.95). However, because MLB recently dumped RealNetworks and signed a deal with MSN, signing up for MSN Premium ($9.95 per month plus the first three months free) includes MLB All Access (and 25MB storage in your hotmail account, instead of the standard 2MB) for about half the standard All-Access price. Some may prefer to sell their souls to the devil before watching baseball or signing up for MSN, but it's a great deal for those whose souls are already sold (baseball fans rejoice!), and it's a good opportunity for Microsoft and baseball jokes.

It was two years ago today when I setup the counter that you see at the bottom of this page, and since that time this page has been visited some 52,500 times. More than that though, but with slightly fewer than two page views per visit, the number of times any page on this site has been loaded since April 4, 2002, hit the 100,000 mark today, exactly two years (729 days) after the count began. So congratuations to me, and thanks for finding my life and thoughts interesting, entertaining, or whatever it is you see in them!

The conference in Savannah was not as extravagant as the one last weekend in Virginia, but this one was much more edutaining. I feel like I learned more and enjoyed myself more than I did last weekend, perhaps mostly because I felt like more of a leader at this conference, and I feel like the information I gathered in Savannah is more directly applicable to my work at Macon State College than what I learned in Virginia. The people were great at each conference, of course, but if I'm going to compare the two, I'm going to say that the Savannah conference was actually a bit better. (James Madison University was much better with the food provisions, since they had their cafeteria cater a four-star meal for us, but we also had 160 students in that group; there were only about 40 of us in Savannah.)

The classroom sessions were effective, and the keynote speaker was inspirational, if I can use that adjective so directly, but the most fun we had was after the speaking was done. Two groups of eight students each participated in a "low-risk task force" exercise, where we were put in situations that forced critical thinking and abstract problem solving. We had ten minutes for each task. Here are some of the things we did:

(Skip this section if you're not interested in the incredibly fun group tasks we completed.)

There was a balance beam, and four of us were on each side of it. Two had to cross it at the same time without falling or touching the ground. If someone touched the ground, we all went back where we started from and had to start over. All eight had to make it across without error. After Carlos and I managed to do it the hard way the very first time we tried it, none of us could do it again, so we ended up sending the small people across on their knees while the tall ones stepped or leaped over them. We finally finished it right after we were told that we had only 10 seconds left.

There was a "spider web", a few tightly drawn, interconnected strands of twine between two trees such that there were eight spaces for us to fit through. Four were about five feet off the ground; the other four were about one foot off the ground. The key was getting through without touching the string, or else we all had to start over; all eight of us had to make it through without contact (including hair). After messing up a few times, I ducked through one of the bottom ones because I was the tallest in our group. The guys then passed three of the girls to me through the upper gaps in the web, then they passed a 170-pound guy who was about my size through the last remaining upper gap; this was incredibly difficult because (a) he was tall and somewhat muscular, making it difficult to keep him steady and (b) I'm a tall, skinny white boy, and I wasn't aware that I was as strong as I was until I had to carry a couple of heavy people through a "spider web". We completed the task with about 30 seconds on the clock.

We then had to complete the "magic shoes" trial. We had to pass through a "pit" to get from one space to another, but only one person could be touching the ground in the pit at one time, and that person could only walk over it once. This meant that we had to carry each other across, run back and get carried across... After messing it up the first time and starting over, we got to the point at the end where Tiffany ran back to be carried across by Carlos, and then Megan was going to run back to be carried across on my back. But we received a ten-second warning just as Tiffany jumped on Carlos' back, and we knew we had no time for that. I was told to jump on Tiffany's back, and before I had time to make sure I was on, he started going. I had no grip and I was holding on for dear life, and as soon as he made it across the pit I slipped and fell onto my back. But hey, we finished it!

There were two more tasks: all eight of us has to fit onto a tiny wooden box and hold our position for three full seconds; that took almost all of the ten minutes, but we finally managed it (practice makes perfect). Our other task began with eight mats arranged in a horseshoe pattern, one for each of us. Already on the mats, we had to arrange ourselves in chronological order of birthdays, but only two feet could touch any mat at any one time. We finished in under two minutes, probably "the fastest time" Mr. Harris had ever seen that task completed.

Finally, there was the "trust fall", in which one of us would stand on a four-foot countertop, turn our backs, and fall flat into the arms of our seven teammates (over the concrete floor of the lobby, no less). The two Megans and one of the other tall guys didn't give it a try; the rest of us enjoyed the rush for a few seconds and were thankful that we weren't dropped on our heads.

I think Mr. Harris said we were the first group he's ever had to complete all five tasks correctly and within their ten-minute limits. We decided that we all deserved certificates with little golden stars on them.

I had a headache throughout all of this, but I had loads of fun, which overrode any pain I was feeling. The day was lots of fun, and Keesha and I even made it back to Macon/Warner Robins in time for Catherine's birthday party. (Don't look now, but I probably misspelled her name too!)

Oh, did I mention the bonding in the hotel room Friday night? Clarissa, Kavata, Keesha, and I picked up a little alcohol and sat up chatting (with Office Space playing, but nobody really watching). We talked about all kinds of things that we wouldn't be allowed to talk about publicly while representing the school, and at one point we had a big group hug/dogpile on one the bed. It was definitely a good weekend!

Last weekend: James Madison University in Harrisonburg, Virginia. Five student members (including me) of the International Students and Studies Association of Macon State College traveled eleven hours by van to somewhere in Virginia for a leadership conference that turned out to be a lot more fun than I had expected. I also had plenty of time to read most of Stephen Hawking's The Universe in a Nutshell, which I understood way too well for someone who has only taken one physics class at the college level.

This weekend: Armstrong Atlantic State University in Savannah, Georgia. Five student members (including me) of the Student Government Association of Macon State College are traveling three hours by car to Georgia's Atlantic coast to enjoy a night on the town before tomorrow's conference. It should be lots of fun and not quite as well organized as the overdone conference in Virginia, but it should be enough to please a small crowd.

Two leadership conferences in two weekends should be enough for anyone, but I'd be looking for more of them, except for the time they take away from the stacks and piles of work that must be done. For instance, I still have a significant research paper on the origins of Confucianism and Taoism to research and write by next Wednesday. I already have eleven books to sift through, so the research will be easy, and I never have a problem organizing my thoughts and putting them to print, so 12-15 pages should come out of this quite easily. I do, of course, plan to sacrifice a couple nights of sleep to ensure this.

April Fools was a blast. I didn't do much, but I was minimally involved in a few office gags that made us laugh. By the end of the day, Stacy (my boss) was paranoid that Adam and Geoff (higher ranked than me, so basically my bosses) were up to something, so they took every opportunity to get a drink of water, visit the restroom, go to the supply closet, or just stand around and look guilty.

Because of all the commotion, I was sufficiently entertained and I actually stayed seated for more than 90 minutes without getting up. Moral of the story: work isn't supposed to be fun all the time, but smiles in the office improve potential productivity. But keep in mind the law of diminishing returns, which in this case would warn that there is a threshold of smiles that, once past, would mean too much fun is being had and not enough work is being done. You know how it goes.

Wish my fellow SGA representatives and me a safe journey, and I'll return to the daily grind sometime Sunday. Aurevoir.

Seventeen people took my "FriendTest", and these are the overall results. I'm going to list each question, the correct answer, and some of the incorrect answers. Enjoy!

Scoreboard:

80 - Keesha (girlfriend)

80 - Clarissa (Vice President of SGA, close friend)

80 - Travis (Quiz Bowl is a life-sharing experience)

80 - Zach (best friend)

70 - Cat (who?)

70 - Dave (he reads my web site)

70 - Hannah (ex-'s best friend that I see more than the ex does)

70 - Mikey (close friend for many years)

70 - Tony (close friend for many years)

60 - Clarissa (ex)

After 19 months, I'm surprised she only got a 60, but I guess she couldn't know my current musical obsessions or that I had joined the International Students and Studies Assocation. So she's just dumb. (I mean that in a loving way, or as much as one could mean anything in a loving way after what she did.) Two more 60s, three 50s, and one 40, make the average score about 65, whether I include the "anonymous" 70 or not.

1. I have an associate's degree in:

Correct: Political Science (6)

Incorrect: Information Technology (10) and Philosophy (1)

2. My car is a:

Correct: Pontiac Grand Am (13)

Incorrect: Honda Accord (4)

3. My Zodiac sign is:

Correct: Cancer (12)

Incorrect: Leo (3) and Scorpio (2)

4. She's wonderful and I'm dating her:

Correct: Keesha (16)

Incorrect: Marissa (1), Summer (0), and Theresa (0) -- three of the main female characters from "The OC".

5. I'm getting my bachelor's degree in Information Technology, and I can't wait to get away from the technology industry!

Correct: True (12)

Incorrect: False (5)

6. I wish I could _____ more often. (Choose the best answer.)

Correct: Go cosmic bowling (6)

Incorrect: Be right (8), Go to the movies (2), and Drink with friends (1)

7. I am not a member of which student organization at school:

Correct: It's a trick! I'm active with all four! (9)

Incorrect: International club (7) and Quiz Bowl (1)

8. My newest musical obsessions are:

Correct: Mew and The Postal Service (9)

Incorrect: The Darkness and A Perfect Circle (8) -- Com'on! I was bragging about A Perfect Circle three years ago!

9. My favorite type of food is:

Correct: Italian (9)

Incorrect: Desserts! (7) and Mexican (1)

10. My first name is:

Correct: John (16)

Incorrect: Andrew (1) -- Um, dude. You're dating my Vice President.

So the good news is that people know my name, for the most part, and only the girl that was once pretty much in love with me (I didn't return the feelings) didn't know about Keesha, which makes sense. I guess I need to talk about music more often, and perhaps let people know what I'm doing with my life, since apparently no one knows what degrees I have or what I'm seeking. Oh, and you forget that I'm a self-righteous, egomaniac -- I couldn't be more right more often if I tried. :-)

It's April 1, and I have yet to devise an elaborate April Fool's Day scheme. I'm off my game this year! That's okay, I have a good excuse. I'm in a relationship that I want to give all my time to, and I'm extremely busy at work and school at almost every other time of the day. What few spare moments I have I use to keep myself sane, and then there's no time left over for insanities like elaborate April Fool's Day schemes. I just need to relax and free my mind. You should too.

Free youd mind, man!