Glenn Reynolds knows exactly what's wrong with America. He knows why teenagers act so immaturely, and he explains who is really to blame. I'll give you a hint: it isn't the kids' fault; kids only know as much as "adults" provide for them.

Here is one argument that I have made several times in the past (in different words, obviously):

Much of high school is wasted time: School meets only about 180 days a year, with a lot of class time wasted on going over the same ground from one year to the next. Teenagers with a powerful desire to be adults should be allowed to follow an accelerated program, with earlier graduation (and perhaps other privileges) as a reward. Many teenagers would take advantage of this, rather than spending extra years in what's little more than a pre-adult holding tank.

I have made similar arguments for years, most often to be dismissed as infantile or disgruntlement. I was rarely taken seriously by an "adult", because to them, it is always the infantile children that don't get it, and they just need to be disciplined better. Well, as Glenn Reynolds explains very effectively, our society's adults could use a healthy dose of discipline.

Argument in closing: in our society's attempt to contain our youth rather than let them expand and grow as they naturally should, we are trodding dangerously near that forboding path that inevitably, eventually leads to totalitarianism. We are not allowing our young minds to develop as they should, and in fact we are hindering their growth. We are slowing our progress for the sake of "fairness" and "equality", and I would not be at all surprised to find out (if it were at all possible to find such out) that the development of this pattern ultimately brings about the end of the human race.

But that's quite a stretch. We still have quite a while left on this planet, assuming we heed the warnings now. Glenn's article is full of them, and it's definitely worth reading.

We no longer need to remember the Alamo. Why? Because someone might get offended! That's the reasoning behind this brilliant idea in Texas: school administrators are aiming to "put a sock in the old saying because they fear that rampant pride will alienate the growing Mexican student population [which makes up over 40% of the Texas student population] in their midst". Oh, fiddlesticks.

On a related note, my coworkers and I were discussing an interesting hypothetical situation this afternoon. If any organization ever set up a scholarship program for white minority students, the shock wave would shake the planet. Racism would be the most obvious (ridiculous) charges, but let's not forget the ignorance of the accuser... You know, the "minority" citizens accusing the white man of being the racist, when in fact, in this particular city, blacks comprise 68% of the population, and whites only 30%.

I should have brought up the other idea that sparked during the discussion, but various tendencies kicked into effect at that moment and I withheld my potentially passionate monologue from the friendly ears of my coworkers... Still, I think it's a good idea: race shouldn't be a political issue. It shouldn't be considered. It shouldn't be dwelled upon. It shouldn't matter. Minority scholarships should not exist. For anyone. Except in the interests of academic merit, which seems to be a minority trait among college students these days, or economic distress. (I'm no socialist, but I recognize the need for allocation of scholarship funds for those who can not afford college tuition.)

On a sidenote, it feels good to be political again. Maybe I should delve into philosophy a little bit, too. I did pick up the Portable Nietzsche this afternoon, quite by accident (and quite for free)...

Two things. First, I've been struggling to find inspiration to write about anything. Second, I've not been home much in the last week around work, family business, and Claire business. Third (I lied), I'm reading a lot so far this summer, making up for years of lost time I guess. Either way, I can't point my finger to any single factor to explain why I haven't had something to say here for nearly a week. I've been here, but when I have been, I just haven't been motivated to say anything.

But I have seen Attack of the Clones a third time, and I've just started my fourth Star Wars novel. (It took me about a month to read The Approaching Storm from late February to mid-March; it took me less than two weeks to read Cloak of Deception between May 4 and May 14; it took me about two weeks to read Darth Maul: Shadow Hunter from May 15 to May 27. I don't keep up intentionally, but I was thinking about it just then... And it's neat to see how long it takes me to read a book.) I should have The Phantom Menace finished and Rogue Planet by the weekend of June 7-9, and after that, I will unfortunately have much more time on my hands to read a dozen or more books over the summer. (Yes... As you may have heard, Claire is moving off to UGA and I'm sticking around Macon. It's not so bad... She could have moved with her parents to Maryland...)

When I'm satisfied with my knowledge of the Star Wars saga (temporarily, of course), I think I might try to read Atlas Shrugged. I hear it's a good book, and it can't take longer to read than the seven Star Wars books that I have chosen to read before July. Naturally, I have others, but I think it should serve me well to expand my literary horizons just a bit for one summer break. A little of Douglas Adams and a lot of Ayn Rand ought to serve me well. If you have any other recommendations, fire away.

Oh, and damnit, I will read Brave New World before September. So don't bother throwing that one at me.

That's it. I've had it. I sit on my ass for hours each day, I eat chips and I drink sodas, and then I sleep. Lather, rinse, repeat. Well, enough. I'm tired of it. (Literally, that routine keeps me tired all the time.) I was in great shape when I graduated from high school, and now my gut has softened and my heart has weakened. I can no longer run after a single flyball without needing to catch my breath. I can't even throw a football as far as my brother anymore. (Given, he's an weight-lifting athlete, but I have always been better at him in most sports simply because of our age difference.) Well, I may never be better than Jim at anything physical ever again, but that doesn't mean that I'm going to let my body wither into that of a lazy, fat bastard who sits in front of a television or computer all day. This is it.

It won't be easy, and I'll probably be too lazy to make any changes immediately. But as I remember this pledge day after day, I will find more and more opportunities to keep my word and do something about it. I don't plan to be skinny nerd forever, and I certainly don't expect to be a skinny, weak man with a fat gut and no social life to speak of. No, I plan to play baseball, play tennis, bowl, run, lift... I plan to enjoy a healthy life, and that means acting now.

My goal? That is my goal. I suppose it would be nice if I could alter my physical appearance in even the slightest noticeable way over the summer, but I'm no idealist. I'm a realist. I know that that isn't exactly plausible, but I do know that, if I put the effort into it, it's certainly a healthy possibility. Don't let me let myself down, or I'm holding you personally responsible (and the terrorists will have won!).

Congratulations to Mike for knowing the box office better than anyone else did (well, those who participated in my almost-pointless little prediction game, anyway). Mike predicted an opening night gross of $30 million and an opening weekend gross around $80 million. Unless the numbers being reported on every major box office web site are mistaken, Attack of the Clones saw "an opening night gross of $30 million and an opening weekend gross around $80 million". Good job, Mike. But I still think the movie will gross closer to $500 million overall than you think; there simply isn't enough competition. Granted, Scooby Doo and Minority Report will probably gross over $250 million and $200 million, respectively, but that won't slow down a Star Wars movie much at all...

I think I am going to start writing some form of reaction or review as I see new movies. On the right, I'll list the movies with their grades, and if a review is actually written, clicking on the movie will take you to it. This is more for me than for you, but I figure it provokes some form of creative thought in all of us... I actually have to review movies, and you get to bitch and complain about my biased criticism. (By the way, every criticism is biased. If your criticism is bias-free, then the terrorists have won.) So, you see, by reading and responding to my reviews, we all win. Except the terrorists, of course.

As for the grading scheme... Think of the letter grades as they would be given in a classroom. The scale follows what I perceive to be the standard scale; from 95 to 99 is an A+, from 90 to 94 is an A– ... and from 60 to 64 is a D–. You can also think of the ratings as ratings on a 1-10 scale; an A+ is a 9.5, an A is a 9.0, and so on. An F would be anything below a 6. Think of it this way: anything at C level or higher is, at worst, a decent movie; at B level or higher, a good movie; at A level, a great movie. There is no such thing as a perfect movie using these ratings, except for whatever movie happens to be my current favorite of all time. Since December of 1999, when I first saw the movie (way too late!), that movie has been The Matrix. This is not to say that I compare movies to The Matrix. A great movie can be great no matter how insignificant it is compared to my favorite; this can be the case with any favorite thing. The point, I guess, is that no movie will rate higher than an A+ until something beats The Matrix (in May, and then December, of 2003).

You will rarely see me rate a movie below C level. Just as in school, a C is essentially the lowest possible passing grade a movie can get. (Theoretically, a D is a passing grade, but in most cases you still have to retake the course if you make below a C, so that's no good.) A C means that the movie has some redeeming quality about it, that it actually isn't a bad movie. D-movies on my list are, quite simply, bad movies    not horrible, but bad. There are signs of decency occasionally, but the movie fails as a whole for various reasons. I won't be watching any D-movies a second time. Anything below a D is absolute trash; you'll probably never see an F-movie from me because I usually avoid watching them.

So there you have it. Assuming this movie project ever gets started, this explanation will be transferred there. Any comments? You know how to reach me...

May. The bringer of warmer temperatures. The bringer of blockbuster movies. The binger of diplomas. May, the month of bloom.

And this May, we are lucky enough to see not one blockbuster movie, but two! I do not think two films as huge as Spiderman and Attack of the Clones have been released in such close proximity before. These two films will certainly gross over $350 million each, and quite likely over $400 million.

But wait, there's more! This may, we also see the end of two of Fox's most successful nighttime drama series ever, "Ally McBeal" and the "X-Files". Ally was never for me; I watched maybe three episodes in the second season, and they were funny, but as the show got wackier and there seemed to be no resolution, I gave up on it.

The "X-Files", on the other hand, has been my favorite television program for over five years. (It would have been longer, but I stubbornly refused to watch it for the first three seasons, mostly because I didn't like the name.) In fact, until just this year, there was no other program on television that I made sure to watch in the same way as I have the "X-Files". The second program? "24" starring Kiefer Sutherland, the most innovative television program I have seen in years    in fact, since the "X-Files". (Of course, you or others will not agree with my interpretation of innovativeness... so it goes.)

Enough introduction. The first season of "24" ended tonight, and the "X-Files" closed for good Sunday night, ending a nine-year run. I don't really know what to say about either finale (or the season/series in whole), except that to say that I can not overstate the degree to which these two programs have impressed me. Sure, my didactic rants in the past have persuaded against falling victim to fiction, to that which is not real, for worry of the entertainment preventing one from seeing the truth (about society in general, I mean)... but everyone needs their outlet from reality, and these two programs were mine for the last year.

"24"... Naturally, the finale leaves its viewers hanging. It's midnight, and Jack is [insert plot detail here], leaving you to wait until next season to find out if that's really how that night ended. I have my doubts... I would like to think that season two would pick up at midnight on the very next day, picking up where the various dramas between various characters and their enemies left off. Of course, it could also be a few days later, or even several months down the line as Senator Palmer is on the verge of being elected... (Perhaps by the time the show is taken off the air, Palmer will be inaugurated as the first black President of the United States!) Well, whatever. This show was an action-packed emotional roller coaster from the start, and I already which there weren't six months between now and season two.

"X-Files"... What can I say? It's the show that, despite my despisal of television, kept me hooked. The creative plot and mythical feel to the show is probably what finally allowed me to enjoy Star Wars a couple years ago, and... well, that should be no surprise. Following Fox Mulder and Dana Scully for the last nine years has been well worth it, even if it had to end the way it did. (I can't really say that I am disappointed with the end, because I already essentially knew about it anyway. I accidentally stumbled upon a former crew member's web site a few months back, and there it was, in black and white green. Without the surprise, it didn't bother me. Still, the hopeful side of me wants Fox Mulder's ultimate wish to come true... "Always in motion the future is.") But more than wonder what might have been with the characters of the show, I wonder what I'm going to do with my Sunday nights without it.

So it looks as though I'm without television for a while, except for the occasional (nightly) Braves game. I predict a summer of computing, watching movies, and driving back and forth between Warner Robins and Athens. Sounds like fun. I wonder if I should drop my last class...

What is more important to the average American citizen? For decades, and likely since our nation's birth, a popular political debate has pitted security versus freedom, a seemingly paradoxical argument that asks the rhetorical question, "What's more important to you, your liberty or your life?" Admittedly, that's a loaded question, and it's issues like this that point to the obvious answer: ultimately, people prefer life over liberty, though taking liberty for the sake of security better-as-hell be an absolute last resort.

What do you think? If your life, and indeed the life of the nation, was truly in danger, would you rather be subjected to government control and monitoring (a la post-September 11 security legislation), or would you rather continue to live freely and independently of such control at an exponentially greater risk of losing your life to terrorist attack? Despite being a strong-willed libertarian, or perhaps because of it, my decision is simple: there is no hope to achieve what I want if I am not alive in the first place, so I would much rather subject myself to less freedom than ultimately to give up my own life. (That may sound unpatriotic to some, but I think war is unpatriotic... Ironic, isn't it? Give me time, I'll justify it in words, perhaps using logic that works for you, but probably not.)

The numbers are in, and George Lucas's second episode of his Star Wars saga didn't take in as much money as I expected it would. At $30,141,417, Episode II's opening day box office figure beats Episode I's by about $1.6, but due to Episode II's showing in 191 theatres more than Episode I, The Phantom Menace pulled in more money per theatre than did Attack of the Clones, at $9610 tp $9535. (Spiderman pulled in $10,901 per theatre on its opening day, $12,067 on its second day.)

The $30.1 million gross undershot our collective (average) prediction by about $1.6 million dollars, or their collective prediction (excluding mine from the average) by about $0.9 million. If any of you would like to adjust your predictions for the weekend, now is the time to do it...

How would I go about explaining the decreased ticket sales (per theatre)? It certainly isn't the movie; Attack of the Clones is easily better than The Phantom Menace, and I loved Episode I! Don't get me wrong; the original story was better for, if nothing else, its originality, but I'm a contemporary guy who prefers contemporary special effects and, well... I guess I am trying to say that I liked Episode I more than any single movie in the original trilogy because it is more modern, and I simply prefer modern movies over classic movies for purely aesthetic reasons. (However, the more I watch The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi, the higher on my list they climb... So I guess it can be said that the first episode in each trilogy should be expected to suck, comparitively speaking, because its primary purpose is to introduce you to the plot of the next two movies.)

My best guess is that too many people were disappointed by The Phantom Menace and thought Attack of the Clones would follow suit. While I must admit that I understand why certain elements of the film (bad acting, Jar Jar Binks, and the overwhelming focus on our child hero) would deter fans from seeing Episode II, I must contest that the appeal of The Phantom Menace has little bearing on the appeal of Attack of the Clones. Besides, those problems are taken care of, mostly: Anakin is grown up, Jar Jar is seen in only briefly in only four scenes (probably no more than 40 seconds of screen time), and the acting is what can be expected from a Star Wars film (nothing spectacular, but nothing horrible)    and the source of Episode I's acting woes, Jake Lloyd, is no longer with the film, as puberty has affected Anakin profoundly. (Okay, so Jake had never really acted before, but his emotionally flat delivery of the line "But I..." in two different scenes were such that even I was disappointed; otherwise, I can see no good reason to be displeased with the quality of the film.)

However, when The Phantom Menace is compared to Attack of the Clones, one can look back and see that, by comparison, Attack of the Clones rules! In Episode I, very little happened with the Jedi on screen. We followed Obi-Wan Kenobi and Qui-Gon Jinn around for most of the movie, but the focus was clearly on Anakin Skywalker. In much the same way as the events of Episode II progressed, the events of Episode I progressed nicely so that the visual climax of the film, the "Duel of the Fates", showed us the most kickass lightsaber duel in the history of Star Wars. (Like I said, the progression of events in Episodes I and II are similar, but a lot more happens in Episode II, if for no better reason than that Anakin Skywalker, who is still the focus of the film, is now a lightsaber-wielding Jedi.)

My biggest complaint about The Phantom Menace is that, despite how well it fits with the story, Darth Maul was destroyed far too quickly and far too unbelievably. Too quickly: The double-bladed lightsaber properly wielded (nice job, Ray Park!) provided the cornerstone for a great lightsaber battle, and it added an evil touch to the already-perfect evil that eminated from Darth Maul's character. Too unbelievable: Okay, I'm no expert on or with the Force, but I know enough to know that the dark side of the Force is extremely difficult to detect ("Hard to see the dark side is") and makes predicting the future    or someone's intentions    near impossible ("The dark side clouds everything"). That said, Darth Maul could easily have detected and should been able to defend Obi-Wan's final blow, especially since Darth Maul was the one responsible for leaving Qui-Gon's lightsaber simply lying there. (He would certainly have thought about it as soon as he kicked Obi-Wan's away.) Aside from that, he had plenty of time to defend Obi-Wan's strike; Darth Maul could have swung his lightsaber before Obi-Wan had even reached Qui-Gon's lightsaber, and Kenobi would have been toast.

How would I have done it? I would alter the scene beginning with the point when Qui-Gon's lightsaber was pulled to Obi-Wan. The lightsaber would have reached him about half of a second sooner so that he is about six feet lower when the blade was activated. Obi-Wan would immediately swing the blade before his flip over Darth Maul (as in the movie), just in time to block the surprised Sith's attacks. Here it would be possible for Darth Maul to be killed in the same motion by which he was killed before, only this time his inability to block the strike would look and feel far more realistic, as he would at least have tried and failed to block it.

However, I think that he would have been able to block it, and the fight should have proceeded for a few moments (or minutes) longer. The fight could have turned in many directions from that point. Obi-Wan could kick Darth Maul into the shaft, where the Sith would fall for a few moments before blasting back out by use of the Force. One way or another, however, if Darth Maul must die in that seen, Obi-Wan would have been too powerful for Darth Maul, and Obi-Wan would have killed him. (The best way for him to die, I think, would be for Obi-Wan, instead of trying to beat him with raw lightsaber skills, to turn Darth Maul's double-bladed lightsaber against him, using the leverage of his own lightsaber like a lever to direct the second blade of Maul's blade into the Sith...

For my biggest three complaints about Episode II (which include minor spoilers) highlight the white space below. I will not give away any plot details, but subtle hints are suggested at the very least, and because my complaints revolve around a single character, much about that character is revealed.

My biggest complaint about Attack of the Clones is how weak and how much less evil Count Dooku (Darth Tyranus) appears to be, especially by comparison to Darth Maul. Not only does Dooku's appearance suggest less evil and less of a menace then did Maul's, but the fact that his cohorts don't seem too terribly afraid of him (in fact, they do not await instructions, but they tell him of their intentions) also downgrades Christopher Lee's role. (Lee is great for the role, but the role could have been better.) For a more powerful Sith leading the Star Wars crew into darker times, his character doesn't feel dark enough.

My second-biggest complaint is that Count Dooku is mentioned in the opening sequence of the film as the leader of the opposition. Why? I think it spoils far too much to tell us exactly who the bad guy is from the very beginning, only not to meet him until well into the film. The only justification for this that I can interpret is that, because of how he explains to Obi-Wan why they should join together to "destroy the Sith", perhaps first-time viewers might be confused about who Count Dooku really is, or whether or not he is truly the bad guy (despite the warning in the opening sequence). However, the scene speaks for itself; it would confuse viewers much more effectively without his name being mentioned in the opening sequence. (Or, better still, they should have used the name "Darth Tyranus" in the opening sequence.)

I have one more complaint, but because it can not be revealed without spoiling a significant amount of the movie to those of you who can not resist highlighting the white space despite not wanting to know, I will not reveal it at this time. If you haven't seen the movie yet, go see it!

It's 3:00 in the afternoon of Episode II's opening day and I have already seen it twice. Despite another packed theatre, the crowd was much quieter this time, actually allowing dialog to be heard rather than laughing and cheering wildly. However, even with the laughing and cheering, the movie was easily worth it, and I will probably go see it again. Before the weekend is out? Not likely. Probably not before June. But I will probably see it in theatre at least one more time.

I don't care what any of the critics say; if you have liked any of the Star Wars films, you will like this one. Good, evil, love, carnage, and lightsabers! Everything you would hope to expect from a good Star Wars film, and it is brilliantly delivered... well, in my opinion. I mean, here I am... I've seen it twice in two possible attempts.

I knew before I saw it that Attack of the Clones would probably be my favorite movie of the year as soon as I saw it, and quite possibly my favorite Star Wars film of the five. I was right. For those of you that thought this was irrational, stupid, or [insert adjective here] because I was making an assumption based only on reviews, reading selections from the book, and several previews... Let me say it one more time: I know myself a helluva lot better than you do, and I was right.

In fact, the movie was so good that we've been up all night talking about it and we're planning on seeing it again    if we can    at noon. We hope it isn't sold out. We need to see this film one more time.

Beginning in less than eight hours here, and already begun in many places around the world, thousands of clones of the latest installment of the second Star Wars trilogy are attacking screens all over the world. Everything that I have read, seen, and heard regarding Episode II - Attack of the Clones indicates that I will absolutely love this film, probably moreso than any of the others. I am certainly more involved in the expanded Star Wars universe now than ever before (I had not seen any of the movies in their entirety until just shortly before The Phantom Menace's release to video), so that may account for some of my expected bias for this film    I am actually familiar with the story surrounding the movie before seeing it this time.

The hour slowly pulling nearer, it is time to analyze my box office predictions; you may see other predictions and their cumulative average to the right. Three years ago this month, The Phantom Menace grossed about $28.5 million on its opening Wednesday, a record at the time, in 2970 theatres. The following day being a Thursday, the box office had to compete with school and work, restricting the box office intake for the movie to about $12.3 million. The movie grossed about $64.8 million over the weekend to break the $100 million mark after five days.

This May, following Episode I's strategy (employing midnight screenings on opening day) but without the intervening weekday between opening day and the weekend, I expect Attack of the Clones to break the $100 million mark in four days rather easily. First, Episode II is opening in 3161 theatres    191 more than the previous installment. Second, ticket prices have risen slightly due to inflation. Third, as previously stated, there is no gap between opening day and the weekend.

Comparing Attack of the Clones to Spiderman is quite different, but it helps to find a balance with my predictions. Two weeks ago, Spiderman opened in 3615 theatres on about 7500 screens. Tomorrow, Attack of the Clones opens in 3161 theatres on about 6100 screens. Okay, so those numbers are hugely separated, but one has to consider that Star Wars has a huge, established fan base; the fans already know what to expect from Lucasfilm. Spiderman, on the other hand, was simply a good movie with great hype, awesome special effects, an emotional plot    in other words, it had something for everyone (which is typical of the average superhero movie). Also typical of the average superhero movie is huge box office results, which Spiderman delivered. And hey, I never said typical was bad. I loved Spiderman. In fact, I plan to go see it again when the crowds have died down, just so I can enjoy it in a quiet theatre this time.

But back to Star Wars... By comparing the new film to both its prequel and its most recent box office rival, I think I've got a reasonably good view from here, and I think I know generally what to expect. However, as with any predictions, I'm subject to being proven wrong... Still, I'm sticking with my original predictions:

Based on all that I have given you, I hope you can rationalize my prediction that Attack of the Clones will reach the $100 million plateau by Saturday night, joining Spiderman as the second movie to gross $100 million in three days. I expect Star Wars to trail off more quickly at first than Spiderman did, but its decadence will slow as the weeks progress; I am still of the impression that Star Wars, being the mega-franchise that it is, has much greater staying power, and will therefore considerably outlast Spiderman in theatres. I also expect Attack of the Clones to out-gross The Phantom Menace, if for no better reason than the comparatively small role that Jar Jar Binks plays in Episode II. Combine that with a love story (girls), betrayal and several action sequences (guys), and a cornucopia of lightsabers (!!!!!)...

There is no way that this movie will sell fewere tickets than Episode I. And given the inflation of ticket prices, that would mean that Episode II would necessarily gross at least $472 million; but I think the margin of victory will be a bit more than that. (Why $472 million? Because the adjusted-for-inflation total gross of Episode I, based on converting ticket prices of 1999 to ticket prices of 2002, is $471.95 million. The adjusted gross of the original Star Wars is almost $970 million, second only to Gone With The Wind, which I've never seen.)

Forty-eight years ago in a small California town (seemingly forever represented by Gary Condit, the sole favorable reason for term limits), a boy was born on a walnut ranch. He was raised on that ranch with his three siblings, where he developed his dream to one day be a racecar driver. However, a near-fatal automobile accident ended that dream just three days before his high school graduation. (His Fiat Biancina was struck broadside by a fellow student's car, and he was sent rolling toward a walnut tree at sixty miles per hour. His seat belt snapped and he was ejected from the vehicle, which collided not a second later with such force that it moved the tree two feet, roots and all. Had the seat belt functioned properly, he would have been killed instantly.)

His racing dreams shattered, he was persuaded to enroll at Modesto Junior College. Two years later, he transferred to the University of Southern California film school, where his new-found talent earned him first prize at the 1967-68 National Student Film Festival for the short film titled, "THX-1138: 4EB". Within two years, he had become good friends with the now-legendary actor/writer/director/producer Francis Ford Coppola, and they established their own company whose first project was a full-length version of THX-1138. After that film, which became an instant cult classic, Coppola went in his own direction and produced The Godfather. Satisfied with his own abilities, George Lucas then established his own company, Lucasfilm, Ltd., and in 1973 he wrote the semi-autobiographical American Graffiti, which won a Golden Globe and earned five Academy Award nominations.

Over the next two years, he worked on the scripts for what would become the first Star Wars trilogy, and in 1975 he established another company, Industrial Light & Magic (ILM), to produce the visual effects needed for the movie. Another company called Sprocket Systems, later Skywalker Sound, was established to edit and mix the films. After several studios turned down the script, 20th Century Fox gave Lucas's story a chance; Lucas agreed to forgo his directing salary in exchange for 40% of the film's box-office take and all merchandising rights. In other words, he wasn't paid for his work on the film; he put his career on the line, depending entirely on the success of Star Wars. The movie went on to break all box office records and earned seven Academy Awards. It redefined the term "blockbuster". The rest, as the unavoidable cliché holds, is history.

George Lucas went on to produce the next two installments of the Star Wars trilogy, and later worked with Steven Spielberg on the Indiana Jones movies. From 1980 to 1985, he was busy with the construction of Skywalker Ranch, built to accommodate the creative, technical, and administrative needs of Lucasfilm. Lucas also revloutionized movie theaters with the THX System which was created to maintain the highest quality standards in motion picture viewing. He went on to make several more movies, including three of my childhood favorites Willow, Howard the Duck, and The Land Before Time, that have created major breakthroughs in film making.

I know it's a day late, and even more obvious, George Lucas will probably never read this. But someone will, and for the infinitesimal chance that the eyes of George Lucas happen to fall upon these words at some point, I'd just like to say this: thanks for sharing your stories! And I agree... don't listen to the fans. Hear them, but don't alter your story for what we want. With a fan base as huge as yours, you're bound to create disappointment no matter how you write it, but far less disappointment than, say, if you were not to write it at all. And happy birthday!

Disclaimer: I received this in an email. I'm sure it exists on the Internet at multiple locations. Just know that this isn't my creation.

*   *   *

A furious light sabre duel is under way. Darth Vader is backing Luke Skywalker toward the end of the gantry. A quick move by Vader chops off Luke's hand! It goes spinning off into the ventilation shaft. Luke backs away. He looks round, but realizes there's nowhere to go but straight down.

VADER: "Obi-Wan never told you what happened to your father."

LUKE: "He told me enough! He told me you killed him!"

VADER: "No! I am your father!"

LUKE: "No, it's not true! It's impossible."

VADER: "Search your feelings; you know it to be true."

LUKE: "NO!"

VADER: "Yes, it is true and you know what else? You know that brass droid of yours?"

LUKE: "Threepio?"

VADER: "Yes, Threepio, I built him when I was seven years old."

LUKE: "No."

VADER: "Seven years old? And what have you done? Look at yourself, no hand, no job, and couldn't even levitate your own ship out of the swamp."

LUKE: "I destroyed your precious Death Star!"

VADER: "When you were 20! When I was 10, I single-handedly destroyed a Trade Federation Droid Control ship!"

LUKE: "Well, it's not my fault."

VADER: "Oh, here we go. 'Poor me! My father never gave me what I wanted for my birthday! Boo hoo! My daddy's the Dark Lord of the Sith. Wahhh wahhh!'"

LUKE: "Shut up."

VADER: "You're a slacker! By the time I was your age, I had exterminated the Jedi knights!"

LUKE: "I used to race my T-16 through Beggar's Canyon!"

VADER: "Oh, for the love of the Emperor, 10 years old, winner of the Boonta Eve Open. Only human to ever fly a Pod Racer, right here baby!"

* * * Luke looks down the shaft and takes a step toward it.

VADER: "I was wrong. You're not my kid. I don't know who you are. But you're certainly no relation to me."

* * * Luke takes a step off the platform, hesitates, then plunges down the shaft. Darth Vader looks after him.

VADER: "And get a haircut!"

Most likely due to May's movie events, I was asked this afternoon who would win in a fight between Spiderman and a Jedi (for instance, Yoda). While one must concede that Spiderman's physical and mental abilities are astonishingly amazing, I think that he would be no match for a well-trained Jedi, if for no better reason than the Jedi's ability to read Peter Parker's mind. But there is so much more to the Force than that...

I pondered the question further. A sarcastic comment was loosely fired in our general direction: "I haven't been asked anything like that since I was a kid, the days of Batman and Superman. Grow up!" Rather than reply to sarcasm with sarcasm, I through Batman and Superman into the fray, and for the helluvit... James Bond. I asked myself, of the following superhero-types, who is the most poweful? That is, who would emerge victorious in one-on-one mortal combat?

I'll begin with who I think are the weakest two of the five: Batman and Bond. Bruce Wayne has extraordinary abilities, but underneath he's just a nutjob with a bat suit, cool gadgets, and dangerous ideas. James Bond is not much different, except that he doesn't dress up like his favorite animal. (Both sets of parents were killed in car accidents when the heroes were fairly young.) Comparing the two: 007 is a well-trained, well-informed, well-backed-up superspy; he's got British intelligence on his side. Batman is well-informed at best; he's got Alfred (and Robin, too, but he can't help in the fight, and is therefore useless). Furthermore, Batman is essentially a nutjob    a man who's obsession with bats doubled with delusions of grandeur (that it is his responsibility to save the world) allow him to dress like a bat while doing his thing. Meanwhile, Bond has a wealth of information, gadgets, and weapons on his side, but he also has a few significant vulnerabilities: his apparent fearlessness often is misguided and can be interpreted as carelessness, and his unhealthy obsession with women causes him far too much trouble. Still, I would choose Bond over Batman by a narrow margin, so Batman is no longer worth considering.

Spiderman could be an even match for James Bond, but it would depend on how the confrontation endured. Bond has a million and one unexpected tricks up his sleeve, but Spiderman has superhuman/superspider abilities that will allow him to elude most of Bond's attacks. Still, Bond's abilities and apparent fearlessness make him an impressive opponent. I would say that Spidey has a clear advantage, but Bond could emerge victorious, again, depending on how combat progressed. After all, Bond is incredibly intelligent, far more so than a high school science wiz. (All the same, Peter Parker is no idiot. It would be interesting.) Spiderman has the obvious physical advantage, but James Bond is notoriously adept at knowing his opponent(s) and exploiting their weaknesses. Still, Spiderman has a range of physical abilities that Bond could not counter in close combat. Clearly and skeptically, the advantage is Spiderman's.

A Jedi, on the other hand, would destroy Spiderman, unless Spidey sprung the perfect trap, which would be nearly impossible given a well-trained Jedi's ability to read one's thoughts    Peter's thoughts would betray him. Considered along with other talents with the Force, I can not imagine a scenario from which Spiderman could emerge victorious. Unless, of course, Spiderman's webbing is lightsaber-proof. The Jedi would likely destroy Spiderman, though, without even breaking a sweat.

And then there's Superman. A Jedi's Force powers make the Jedi the most capable opponent I can think of... but capable enough to beat Superman? That is deserving of some thought. Superman has so many special abilities, not the least important of which is the ability to fly, that it is difficult to guage how a battle between Superman and Yoda would go. On one hand, a Jedi is extremely resourceful, and the mostly defensive strategy would make it difficult for Superman to strike cleanly without forcing injury to himself. On the other hand, Superman has the ability to alter or erase memory or thoughts in ordinary humans, so can it be assumed that he could do the same with a Jedi, or is the Jedi's ability to communicate with the Force a shield from that power? If not, then the Jedi's defeat begs the question:

Is Superman a Super-Jedi? Is Superman of a race that has ultimate control over "the Force"? It seems that the ability to fly and to alter memory is far superior to a Jedi's abilities with the force, so it isn't out of the question to suggest that Superman is nothing more complicated than the highest level of Jedi Master... so high, in fact, that little concentration is required in order to utilize the powers granted by the Force. The contradiction to the Super-Jedi argument would be Superman's apprent inability to save falling Statues of Liberty by manipulation of the Force. In any event, Superman would kick Yoda's ass, unless Superman's abilities are independent of the Force, which would allow Yoda to manipulate the Force to Superman's disadvantage... So, you see, it depends on a technicality.

Still, Superman is supreme. Unless you wish to tell me otherwise...

I should be asleep, but I'm not, and because it's been over two days since I last graced you with evidence of my presence, I figured a few words couldn't hurt. However, I should warn you: my body is engulfed in "civil" war right now. I was simply walking along at the library when I felt a little twinge. I tried to bend and stretch, when suddenly it locked. The muscle(s) in my lower back were refusing orders from the command center (motor strip) and fired one warning shot (of pain). It continues to fire shots at even the simplest acts of defiance    sitting down, standing up, walking    in response to every movement! What's worse? I work in a library! Shelving books! Which requires bending over for roughly eight hours! I don't know if I can take eight hours of it...

I finished James Luceno's Star Wars: Cloak of Deception this afternoon. It took a bit longer than I had anticipated, but mostly because I hadn't anticipated two sizable family gatherings this weekend, and I hadn't anticipated inviting a friend over for a day or so. I don't care to spoil too much of the book, so I won't. I'll simply say that it is chronologically (in the Star Wars universe) the earliest full novel; it predates The Phantom Menace by no more than a year, though Michael Reaves's Darth Maul: Shadow Hunter squeezes between the two works quite nicely. I'll also say that Cloak of Deception is the best read I have had in a long time; it easily beats any other Star Wars story that I have ever read, and any other books that I have read in recent years    except Douglas Adams's Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, of course...

Last night, after minimal coaxing from younger cousins (well, second cousins), I whipped out something I hadn't whipped out in a long time    since before I moved into this house in October, in fact    Goldeneye 007 and Perfect Dark for the Nintendo 64! Ah... it felt good to slip my translucent, brilliant blue controller into my hands again; to see the animated enemies twirl and fall in agony of receiving fatal shots to random parts of their bodies... I've missed my games. Maybe it's time to play them for a solid couple of months... Or maybe not.

About a week ago, I predicted that either Spiderman or Attack of the Clones would have a $40 million opening night, $100 million opening weekend, and a $130 million opening week. Well, Spiderman came very close with a $39.4 million opening night, and blew away my other predictions with a $114.8 million opening weekend and a $151.6 million opening week! It seems almost certain that Spiderman, after being the fastest ever to $100 million and to $150 million, will be the fastest ever to $200 million. Assuming Attack of the Clones doesn't take away too many ticket sales, Spiderman could also be the fastest movie to $250 million and to $300 million. I would expect the records to drop off after that, though, because I do not expect that Spiderman will have enough staying power to get into $400 million territory (but I would love to be proven wrong!).

Look to the right to see the collected predictions for Episode II's box office numbers, and click here to send yours!

In case you haven't noticed, I'm caught up in this right now. Don't worry, it's only a phase, and it's likely to last most of the summer. However, with six weeks between Attack of the Clones and Men In Black 2, I won't have much to say about box office numbers for a while, so I expect to get back into politics and philosophy pretty heavily by the first week of June. Until then, well, what you see is what you get!

"How much do you want to know about a movie before it comes out?" Every single detail? Nothing at all? Or some amount in between... A little teaser to warn you of things to come, just to set you up for all the surprises of the film, but not to give anything major away? Well, that's a difficult question to ask, and it's even more difficult to find consistent answers to it.

This Fox News article dissects the issue, covering the good and the bad of spoiling plot details (mostly the bad, since the majority opinion seems to think it's all bad). Perhaps it's biased (well, of course it is), but it seems that everyone is pointing fingers at spoiler sites that just love to show off what they know about something before the information is publicly available.

I will not deny that spoilers are sometimes good for a movie; they are! Sometimes. For instance, let's take a look at Star Wars. We already know what is going to happen with Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi, we just don't know how it will happen, when it will happen (with regard to the Star Wars universe's chronology), and what major events and characters will be involved. A spoiler here and there for the fanatics is certainly not a bad thing, because they crave answers to their questions. They want to know what happens, when, how, and why, and they don't want to wait three years for the next movie, or even six days for this one. If the information is available, they want it. And with that information, most of them can't stand the torture of waiting for their chance to see it on the silver screen.

But then there are the "friendless" webmasters who apparently think that, by publicizing plot details and character developments long before the movie is available, they will be praised for their being "in the know" and sharing the answers. What these webmasters don't realize is that, unless visitors to their web site are coming to their web site expressly for that purpose, most of them don't want to know.

There is a difference between making the information available and forcing it upon people. The better spoilers are very subtle and/or vague; the best spoilers are hidden from plain view and require user acceptance before viewing them. The worst spoilers take the form of blatant headlines, which a visitor may or may not want to see, such as, "DARTH MAUL GETS CUT IN HALF!" (I came across this headline in April 1999; I was less than pleased, and I didn't see The Phantom Menace until April 2000. Of course, I didn't see any of Episodes IV through VI until the previous week, but I was going to see them a week before seeing Episode I regardless of when I actually chose to see Episode I.).

That said, one must be careful when reading previews and reviews before watching a movie, such as Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones. The Box Office Mojo review begins,

Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones is a bag of chocolate covered peanuts    if you worship chocolate and are allergic to nuts. Luckily for Lucas, the film, and the audience; the last forty minutes contains more chocolate than Willy Wonka's factory, as inspired action overrides the stale dialogue and stilted acting from established stars.

Reading only the first few words of the next line, I know that that is all I want to know from that review. All reviews spoil something    whether it is a huge plot detail or something minor    and more often than not, it's more information than I wanted. However, Star Wars is an exception to me, as there are few reviews that could tell me more than I want to know, because there are only few details in the movie of which I am unaware.

I guess what I'm trying to say is: Beware of spoilers and where they lurk, and don't get mad at he who made it available if you chose to read it after a clear warning...

If you read this, I would like you to do a quick favor for me. Send me an email with your predictions on how many millions Star Wars: Episode II - Attack of the Clones will make on its opening day (Thursday, May 16), for its opening weekend (Thursday through Sunday), and for its total Box Office gross. There really is no point, except that I would like to compile some sort of list or average just to see how right or wrong we can be. In the wake of Spiderman's record-setting opening, I think more of us are curious about Box Office numbers than usual, so it would be an interesting experiment.

Here are my predictions for Attack of the Clones:

Remember that I am including opening night with the opening weekend, so I am predicting just over $100 million for the Friday-through-Sunday run, which would fall second to Spiderman's recent record.

The total gross is difficult to predict, as it won't be settled for several weeks at least. I don't think that the movie can make less than $450 million, and I think it has an good chance of breaking $500 million. Therefore, $480 million is a reasonable estimate for me.

It won't take you sixty seconds to click right here and type in three numbers. So, if I know that you read my web site every day, send me your predictions!

Word to Matt Drudge: For years, you've been the best at what you do, and that's breaking news stories before anyone else. And they're not just any news stories, but the stories that people want to hear about. Now you're giving your own little quarrel with Bill O'Reilly top-headline status, and it shouldn't even make your list of headlines. This is America; we are capitalists; this is how we operate. Money is used for far worse things than influencing a radio station to carry a radio show. And let me tell you, if I had the money, and I was starting something new on my own, I can guarantee you that I would use utilize my own financial freedom to support myself.

Word to Bill O'Reilly: Quit acting like you've done something wrong. Until you got pissed off at Drudge for sharing a few facts, nothing you had done could be considered even remotely wrong. (Not standard, sure, but not wrong by any means.) Let Drudge have his story, and use it to your advantage. Tell the people that funds were available, and the company was willing on spending them on you. There is nothing wrong with that, especially from a Libertarian/Independent standpoint.

Both of you are acting like children, and that can't be good for ratings. (Although, unfortunately, Drudge is expected to act how he's acting right now    after all, O'Reilly did verbally attack him    so I would guess that I hold the minority opinion here.)

This is the type of review that should never be written. Roger Friendman not only makes himself look like an ass, but when Attack of the Clones makes its close-to-$500 million, as it inevitably will, he will also look like an idiot. Based on his review, one can gather [I gathered] that Friedman is looking for Academy Award material. (I also gathered that he thinks he is the god of movie critics and that he speaks for everyone.) Hey, Roger, it doesn't work like that. It's just a movie. George Lucas is not just one of the most successful movie-makers of all time, but also one of the best story-tellers. If you don't like the quality of his movies, don't watch them!

However, all that I just said doesn't matter, because Roger Friedman proves that he has no idea what he's talking about right here: "Nothing new is offered or introduced, no new plot twists or revelations. Clones just pushes along to make way for Episode III, which will eventually lead back to Episode IV and the story we already know." Hah! So there. Friedman didn't even watch the movie.

And he obviously has no idea that Star Wars was originally a comic book. George Lucas wasn't trained as a director. George Lucas wrote a story, and he has the right to see to it that his story turns out.

Friedman's just bitter. And, when Attack of the Clones makes over $450 million, he'll be miserable and George Lucas will be happy. So the world is a happy place...

You have to see this!

Dave Matthews Band will release their fifth studio album, called Busted Stuff, on July 16. I have heard a few of the tracks that will be on the album from live performances; I can barely stand to wait until my birthday (July 18) to hear the album!

Well, in reality, I probably won't. I'll probably hear the album a week or two in advance through the wonders of the Internet. It isn't that I try to find albums online; when they are offered, I rarely hesitate. I hear something, I like it, and if it's worth keeping, I buy it. Dave Matthews Band is worth buying regardless. So I don't feel guilty when I download it...

Last night was one of the better nights I have had in recent memory. I had planned to relax at home after working for seven-and-a-half hours straight. I had (and still have) homework to be done before my last class on Monday morning, and I did not need to make the trip to Warner Robins just to go bowling with a few people that I can see next weekend with no obligations in front of me. However, when I learned that a small reunion was planned, bringing both Mikes, Zach, Scott, and me together again for a night of Thunder Alley bowling, I couldn't resist. (Then again, I had no idea that Mike Y. would show up until he showed up at about 8:30    departure time. He was the icing on our reunion cake. Er, I won't repeat that.)

Of course, they started it fifteen minutes late, which translated to two hours worth over our eight-person group, and since Thunder Alley is only supposed to last for two hours anyway, *cough* I didn't pay. So Mike and Zach, our ritual post-bowling Waffle House snack was provided by the Robins Bowling Center. ("Mmm. I'm hungry. And I've got an extra ten bucks...")

Leaving all other details aside *ahem*, after a few more hours of just hanging out, we decided to go our separate ways. The rain was still coming down, and if you know my car, you know the tires are in no shape to make a forty-mile drive in the rain at night! But that didn't matter much; I was planning on chilling with Zach for the night anyway. After leaving Mike's at around 2:45, we chatted about everything best friends chat about until about 5:15 before finally deciding to get a little sleep.

We've got to do this more often, guys. And Claire, you better be there next time!

Two days ago, I predicted that SpiderMan would gross $40 million on opening night, $100 million over the entire weekend, and $130 million over its first full week. "Ordinarily," I said, "that would be like asking for rain in the Sahara. But today, it's like predicting lemonade from a lemon."

SpiderMan grossed about $39.3 million on opening night, just short of my hopeful prediction, but its $43.7 million Saturday night all but ensured a $100 million weekend. According to the latest estimates, the movie will gross another $30 million or so today and break the $110 million mark for the weekend. (I wasn't realy underestimating; I just didn't specify how far over $100 million I thought it would be. I actually didn't think about that...)

As for my $130 million prediction for the rest of the week... that could prove to be difficult. It depends on how many people decide that they need to see this movie (again?) and how the theatre can combat work and school. I don't think there will be a problem; people want to see SpiderMan before Attack of the Clones comes out (and some others want to see SpiderMan after Attack of the Clones comes out, just for the comfort of a quiet theatre. I think I'll do that... After I see Star Wars, of course. I've already bought those tickets!)

So SpiderMan kicks ass, Tobey Maquire and the rest of the cast and crew did a great job, and it's making the money to show for it. I'll hold steadfast with my prediction that the movie will gross upwards of $300 million and might break $400 million    I predict about $350-360 million. As for Attack of the Clones, I'm aiming high: $450 million before it's through, with a strong chance for $500 million.

I would not be disappointed if SpiderMan surprised me and grossed over $400 million, nor would I be disappointed if Star Wars grossed over $600 million. But, realistically, how likely is that? Not likely enough! Make it happen!

Despite the hype, I actually expected the movie to be good    no better, no worse, just good. I expected the acrobatics to be cheesy and annoying, and (most of all) I expected the villain to be so cheesy that I wouldn't believe in his threat. I almost compared the villain to Montgomery Burns on several occasions before seeing the movie, just for the childish, it-could-never-happen feeling he gave me. However, after actually watching the movie, all of that subsided. Given the genre, being a fantasy action flick, Raim and friends actually made a damn good movie    easily my favorite of the year so far. (Was there ever any doubt?)

Take today or tomorrow and go watch Spider-Man. It's definitely the best the year has seen so far; it's worth seeing! Action, comedy, fantasy, romance... a little of something for everybody. Despite that, it is very coherent and well put together.

I'm about to be late for work. Later!

I would never have guessed... The movie with the best return on investment (counting movies with budgets over $70 million) is Independence Day, with an international intake of over $810 million, compared to its $75 million budget. Titanic ($1.83 billion to $200 million), Lord of the Rings ($815 million to $95 million), The Phantom Menace ($923 million to $115 million), and Harry Potter ($954 million to $125 million) are far behind in second, third, fourth, and fifth, though Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings are still making millions per week around the world.

SpiderMan and Attack of the Clones will make that list soon...

According to the New York Post, Spider-Man could break Harry Potter's weekend Box Office record. Some analysts predict the movie to gross over $100 million this weekend. I wouldn't be surprised, especially after what little research I've done on recent Box Office numbers. Adding to Spider-Man's potential, the movie is opening in 3612 theatres on more than 7000 screens. Only Harry Potter (3672) and Mission: Impossible 2 (3653) have opened in more theatres. As we know, Harry Potter grossed over $317.3 million (might climb a little more before it's through); M:I2 wound up at $215.4 million.

Other records that Spider-Man (or Attack of the Clones) should break:

Considering that The Phantom Menace grossed $124.7 million in its opening week in 1999, and that it grossed a second-best $28.5 million opening night (on a Wednesday, whereas Harry Potter's opening night was a Friday), I don't think Attack of the Clones will have any trouble beating that record.Spider-Man, as a franchise, has yet to prove itself, so I can't stick my neck out and say it will have no trouble. I expect it to gross upwards of $300 million like Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings, but that remains to be seen. Star Wars is well established...

I am way too caught up in this. So I'll end it with this. No matter which movie does it, this is what I want to see (if not this weekend, then two weekends from now): a $40 million opening night, a $100 million opening weekend, and a $130 million opening week. Ordinarily, that would be like asking for rain in the Sahara. But today, it's like predicting lemonade from a lemon.

(In case you haven't noticed, I really want these two movies to do well. I have nothing against Harry Potter; that was a good movie. However, I have everything against Titanic, which was brutally formulaic and hideously expected from one moment to the next. If it all possible, I would love for SpiderMan to gross $601 million...)

Er, literally. Will Smith, James Lassiter, and friends is developing the pilot for a syndicated daily, half-hour news magazine called "Good News". "The project will chronicle struggles and triumphs of inspirational individuals, including celebrities, public figures and everyday heroes. Each episode will be told from the perspective of someone who has been touched by the subject."

This project has two good things working for it. (1) Will Smith. The man is just smiled upon. He is good news, no matter how you look about him. (2) There is nothing like "Good News" on television. People should flock to it, if some other network doesn't steal his idea and put something else out first.

Speaking of good news, I bought four more DVD movies yesterday, two of which star Will Smith. I finally bought the Men In Black DVD, and Enemy of the State (probably my favorite of all the conspiracy-theory movies) was free after the purchase of Pearl Harbor. The fourth DVD was a necessary edition to my steadily expanding collection: Spaceballs! You can't go wrong with a movie that spoofs Star Wars, Star Trek, Planet of the Apes, and every other significant theatrical faux pas in 100 minutes.

Add that to the hilarity of Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back, and my Star Wars spoof collection is also steadily (yet much more slowly) mounting. Does anyone know of any other Star Wars spoofs worth taking a look at?

Looking at the weekend Box Office totals for 2002, I have come to one conclusion. People are saving up for SpiderMan and Star Wars! What's going to be the best weekend for the Box Office this year? May 16-20. SpiderMan, after having made $200 million of its own, will still pull in several millions over its third weekend, as Star Wars is released and brings in over $100 million in four days. I mean, it makes perfect sense to me. All year long, Box Office weekend results have tallied at an average of about $130 million, and for the past three weeks straight it's been under $100 million. People are saving up... and starting today, they're letting loose!

I predict a $250 million run for SpiderMan; the PG-13 rating should easily allow for that. I'll let you know how it turns out!

A note about the SpiderMan soundtrack: Chad Kroeger's song, "Hereo, is amazing. The rest of it is pretty much rock-oriented, which doesn't bother me. They could have picked someone other than Aerosmith to remake the theme, though. I think a boyband + Britney Spears rendition would have fit the bill perfectly, as they have the high voices and attitudes to more genuinely reproduce the music. However, that's not what they're going for. They're going for a rocking song whose music reflects the attitude of the film. And you certainly wouldn't get that with boybands or Britney Spears... (Instead, you'd get about $40 million less in ticket sales.)

The primary purpose of homework is to reinforce knowledge of some given subject. If the knowledge does not need reinforcement, then the homework may be determined to be needless intrusion on one's ability to choose in which daily activities to participate. I have come about this viewpoint regarding homework because, well, I retain information well for a longer period of time than the average person, or at least the information I learn in school. Perhaps it is arrogant: my knack for remembering things well for a longer period of time than the average person should not necessarily excuse me from putting in the same amount of effort. All the same, if I am capable of learning the material with less effort, then shouldn't I be allowed to proceed, if I should put in the equal effort and do the same amount of work, and learn more in accordance with my knack for handling knowledge?

But noooooooo! That would be unfair! That would be special treatment! The perception of serving the special abilities of one over the special needs of another (which would actually be served equally at the same time, naturally allowing the more able to get ahead while the less able advances at the expected pace) is interpreted as simply bad by the emotionalists of the world.

By promoting equal status over equal opportunity, we are limiting individuals from realizing their potential, and are therefore limiting our potential as a whole. We are reducing the faster, smarter, and generally more able persons to the lowest common denominator, refusing to allow them to utilize their knowledge and skills, and instead encouraging them to slow down    just so the less able don't feel bad!

This will catch up to us. We will all pay the price for the decision of a few. That is the goal of collectivism. In a collectivist society, an elite make the decisions and drive the masses to think together and accept responsibility together, so that any shortcomings are blamed not on the few actually responsible, but on society as a whole. It is not the fault of the idiot who screwed up, but on everyone together. This way, wrongness is not encouraged to be correctable, and guilt is not encouraged to be punishable. The quality of living generally declines, as does the society in question, leaving in its place the shell of a formerly great nation.

Look around the globe. There are a few significant examples. Collective socialism is not the answer.

If I were in high school, I would turn this in to my English teacher. I mean, hell, I turned in a "Modest Proposal" to eliminate required literature classes from the face of the globe...and received a 100 for it. (Note: Literature classes were classified as those which needlessly forced students to read prose and poetry for the sake of understanding style. Puh! Style is subjective and should not be taught in schools; students expressing their "styles" is one of the larger problems schools face today. No, I advocated that all such classes would be replaced by more valuable language arts courses which focused on the structure and philosophy of language and the established rules of spelling and grammar.)

I just linked homework to the problems of public education to socialism, and then literature classes to the problems of public education, which were previously linked to homework and socialism. I therefore conclude that required literature classes are rudimentary vanguards of socialist-communist thought and should be wiped from the face of the planet. Reading should be a pleasure, not a nuisance. Stop devoting entire (required) classes to literature and allow children to choose what to read and when to read it. Reading is too valuable to be devalued.

One assumes, at some point, that Anakin Skywalker's path to the dark side of the Force is influenced by his inability to save his mother. That said, The Phantom Menace leaves a very important question unanswered. Considering the wealth of Naboo, and its relative proximity to the sector containing Tatooine, why doesn't Queen Amidala dispatch her agents to purchase the freedom of Shmi Skywalker (Anakin's mother)? Anakin would certainly understand, if not at age nine in The Phantom Menace, then at least by age twenty in Attack of the Clones, that the Jedi Council or Padmé or somenoe could afford the resources to rescuse his mother from the bondage of slavery. So why is nothing done?

Another question I have, though it is less of a plot issue and more of a question that may or may not be resolved in Episode II or III, regards Padmé's death. Obviously, Anakin is still around in Episodes IV through VI and she is not, so what happened? I only ask because the knowledge of how her end came to be could prove useful for interpretating Darth Vader's return to the light side of the force at the end of Return of the Jedi ... that fabled moment when balance was restored to the force, fulfilling the prophecy (and for all intents and purposes, ending the story of the Jedi).

I have read The Approaching Storm by Alan Dean Foster, a prequel novel that I have jokingly referred to as Episode 1-and-a-half. (Well, if it is Episode 1.5, Greg Bear's Rogue Planet would be episode 1-and-a-quarter, covering the early stages of Anakin's Jedi training.) I have now gone back to read James Luceno's Cloak of Deception, a novel that precedes The Phantom Menace by a few years, it seems. Luceno's novel, paired with Darth Maul: Shadow Hunter, allegedly sets up the events of Episode I, detailing the involvement of Darth Sidious and Palpatine in setting up the trade blockade of Naboo. I hope to have both Cloak of Deception and Darth Maul: Shadow Hunter read by the night of May 15 (twelve days!) so that I may truly understand the events about to occur in Episode II.

Oh yeah... I bought tickets to the midnight screening of Attack of the Clones for Tony's birthday. Claire and I thought that seeing the new Star Wars episode for his twentieth birthday would be a fun treat. I decided that he should decide who uses the fourth ticket, simply because it was his birthday present. I also bought the novelization of the movie for him, which he plans to read before he sees the movie. (I wonder if I can actually read two books in the time it takes him to read one. Dare try to, I might. Hmm?)

Finally, some news to which I am not sure how to react (I guess I'll save reaction for confirmation): Supposedly Macaulay Culkin has been signed for Episode III. In 1992, George Lucas wanted Culkin to play young Anakin in Episode I, but that obviously didn't happen. As for Episode III, Anakin is already taken, and Culkin is too old to play Luke. I guess he'll play some other minor role... if the rumor has any truth to it at all. It doesn't make sense though. Lucas tends to snag high-quality or high-class actors that aren't extremely well-known (Samuel L. Jackson and Christopher Lee are exceptions, and an argument could be made for Ewan McGregor). The idea is that Star Wars actors should be recognized elsewhere for their work in Lucas's film(s), not recognized in Star Wars for their work elsewhere.

At least it isn't Leonardo DiCaprio.

Similar to the Pink Floyd article and in Best of the Web fashion, today's Fox News weblog feature highlights a few more useless idiots... Now only if we could come up with something to do with them. I bet Neal Boortz has a list of healthy recommendations.

I watched the Pirelli Tower in Milan burn after a small plane flew into it, and regretted that after everyone fled, the ugliest landmark in an already ugly city was managing to stay upright. That cinderblock-and-glass factory in the air looked cardboardy enough to collapse. But the Milanese don't get that lucky. Come friendly bombs, indeed.

I mean, really, who writes this stuff? Especially after what happened last September? (Actually, I would link to it, but I can't find the article... only the quoted material from the Fox News article.) Who raises people that are this dumb? (Well, I suppose that's getting easier, since we're not holding anyone accountable for anything any more.)

Aaron Page of the Cornell Daily Sun suggests that Pink Floyd's The Wall sends a message of anti-collectivism; thinking about it, I don't disagree. Ignoring that he mistakenly called David Gilmore "Doug", this is an excellent piece about one of my favorite bands ... or about anti-American, socialist idiots ... or both. It all begins because a socialist zealot is preaching his anti-American, anti-Israeli, pro-bin Laden speech wearing a Pink Floyd. And the irony sets in...

But skipping ahead to the meat of the article:

In general, those on the extreme left are so desperate to gain a critical mass of support that they aggregate any random dissenter into one strand of rebellion, no matter how disparate their causes of action actually are. Such was the case in the recent D.C. protests, where thousands rallied "together" for causes ranging from Yasser Arafat to the Kyoto protocols.

Page essentially analyzes the lyrics of Pink Floyd's epic album in order to interpret their views regarding political economics. According to this interpretation (which, again, I can not disagree with now that I think of The Wall in this way), the album depicts a character, called "Pink" in the lyrics,

...who is alienated from himself and from society. Struggling to maintain his individuality in the face of overwhelming pressure to conform from family, teachers, and the government, he eventually becomes "Comfortably Numb" and meets his end at "The Trial". However, Pink's alienation is not the Marxist industrial brand of worker alienation from his job, but rather a subtler estrangement from the forces around him that would govern his life. Pink is an individualist in a society that treats such tendencies as a most unwelcome character trait.

The rest of it is written so well that I can't help but copy and paste it here:

So... the only two bands that I have ever really been obsessed with for any extended period of time, Creed and Pink Floyd, both promote libertarian individualism through their lyrics. I can't say that that surprises me. It justifies my listening to them!